Goal setting goes far beyond initial wants. Achieving your goals is only possible when you have follow through and heart. Its one thing to say “I want to do such and such” but its something completely different to say and mean “I won’t give up until such and such is completed”

As LGBT people we face unique obstacles that many others do not. Except perhaps minority groups today. But even then we are unique in that some of us are still fighting for recognition that we are legitimately born as we are, like those of different colors. This problem is compounded when you are gay and black for instance and even more compounded when you are black and trans. Or mexican and gay etc. God forbid you are middle eastern and gay…

We have goals that are similar in nature to one another as LGBT family. We, for the most part, want to be treated with dignity and respect. Our differences arise when our idea of dignity and respect differs. For some this means that we walk into a room and nobody knows anything about us, no assumptions, no stigmas. For others its walking into a room and every head turns and knows, “this person is such and such and there is no doubt!”

I believe that both angles are correct and it is simply a matter of perception and what each person needs and wants in life. Some are content with going to the grocery store every day and nobody mentioning the fact that they are holding hands with the same sex, it shoudn’t even be a thought in anyone else’s mind. For others, not so much.

But we cannot give up when one part of our goal doesn’t go as planned. We cannot give up when the going gets rough. We have to keep on going because one thing I have figured out, nobody is going to hand you equality. Nobody. Not your Mother, not your boyfriend, not your girlfriend, not the neighbor down the street, not your boss, not the government, not any organization…nobody. You and you alone are the only one who is going to look out for exactly what you need.

The sooner we realize that in order for us to get the help that we need we first must help ourselves. If we do not love ourselves enough to give ourselves the best, how can we expect anyone else to give us their best? That is not how the world works, not now, nor has it ever.

Yes, getting what you want as far as any goal is going to be a challenge, but you can do it, you must do it. Because nobody is going to hand it to you. If you want something, your going to have to fight to get it because all the free stuff is gone, believe that.

But know this, while you are going out to accomplish your life, so am I and hundreds of thousands of others are too. Your not alone, there is support out there. Go get your life, your worth it.

With Love
Jeff Utnage